In meetings last week I heard two leaders, from two different organizations, say the very same thing. They did not use the same words, though. Here’s what each said:

Sam: “I don’t have to be the one to decide everything.”

Dan: “My two favorite words are, ‘You decide.’”

Both Sam and Dan had the exact same intent: to empower their people. They wanted to set expectations for decision-making authority, delegation, etc., all that good stuff. I believe both were sincere. And I’ll bet you can guess who had more success winning over their audience.

As a communications consultant, I spend my days thinking about messaging. I listen for examples like these to help the leaders I write for get better at connecting with their audiences. It’s not rocket science, no. But there is some neuroscience to it. How thoughts are packaged and “framed” has a huge impact on how the messages are received.

What do I mean by “framed?” A linguistic frame is a guide. It directs you where to look and helps you interpret, or make sense, of information. Every message is presented through a frame of some sort.

While Sam and Dan were expressing essentially the same thought, the choice of framing was quite different. Let’s look at each…

Sam: “I don’t have to be the one to decide everything.” 

Sam’s frame of “things Sam does not do” is a do-not-disturb sign. Sam is too busy and too important to be bothered with this list of things… “I don’t” is language that pushes back. It sets Sam apart from the others. Since Sam is the boss, it reinforces the hierarchy. It is the opposite of a move bring a group together and be collaborative and empowering. It’s even a little whiny, petulant. What Sam was thinking is, “People, step up!”

(I don’t know about you, but I don’t do my best work when someone is yelling at me to ‘step up.’)

Dan: “My two favorite words are, ‘You decide.’”

Meanwhile Dan is delightful and empowering. Dan is a leader who has “favorite words” at work. Imagine! A positive frame like “list of favorite things” sets the tone for a culture of fun at work. And using “you” is one of those Sales 101 lessons—the most important word to use when you want to build a relationship is “you.” It’s a contagion of inclusion. What Dan is thinking is, “Woo hoo! They can do it!”

Okay so I exaggerated the details for dramatic effect, but the quotes are real. And no, I won’t tell you Sam’s true identity, but I will tell you who Dan is. It’s Dan Purvis, and with Jason Smith, he wrote an awesome leadership book called 28 Days to Save the World. If you like the sound of a leader whose favorite words are, “You decide,” I encourage you to read it.
​
What fun things are you hearing in meetings these days?


Article was originally posted to LinkedIn by Sonia Checchia on 1/25/2024

Photo credit: Sonia Checchia. A field of sunflowers (which has nothing to do with the article, but I like it better than the free clip art).

​As you are starting a new leadership role, you are likely thinking about the professional challenge ahead of you... For weeks or months, you have been considering why the position or organization is a good fit for you, and how you will make your mark in the role. You’re likely pretty excited or nervous—or both. That’s all good.

As you go into those first meetings with your team, though, you need to get out of your head. In order to be successful, your first order of business is building relationships. Step away from that internal dialogue on what’s in it for you, read the room, and empathize…

First, listen.

Ask questions, get curious, get into tell-me-more mode…What are the pain points? What surprises can be avoided? What is it that no one wants to tell you?

Then, share.

When you get to the sharing part, however, make it less about your resume and more about the immediate need-to-know items on their minds...

In my experience writing communications for executives, and being on the receiving end as an employee in the audience of the all-hands meetings, there are three things your team needs to know now. You can get off to a good start by leading with those details. They may not feel comfortable asking, or they may not think to ask. Trust me on this one! Address these three things and you’ll pave the way for open dialogue.

1. What’s new? A new boss means change for you and for them. Address it. As much as you know about what is to come, talk openly about. What priorities are going to change? How will my day-to-day change?

2. Expiration? If it’s an interim role, share the timeline. How long are you here for? What is happening with the search?

3. Meta talk! How will you communicate and keep the channels of info-flow going? Let’s plan for that before things get busy…Specifically:

• Establish a feedback loop – set the tone for sharing feedback (both ways!) early and often
• How are you available – e.g., email, get on my calendar, text, etc.
• Where they can find you – days of the week in the office, travel schedule, etc.

What would you add to the list?



This article was posted Sonia Checchia's LinkedIn articles on October 11, 2023.

Photo credit: Janeb13 (Pixabay)

At the start of the pandemic, some visionary and forward-thinking leaders posed the question, ‘How do we want to emerge from the pandemic?’ (You may have been among them?)

It’s time to circle back and look at current trends. If the pandemic taught us anything, it’s that looking at trends inside the walls of the workplace is not enough to truly understand the employee experience. We need to broaden the aperture and consider what’s happening in at work and beyond. I’ll get us started:

1. We're lonely – U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy cautions that the U.S. is suffering from an epidemic of loneliness. We’re not connecting, and social connection is key to physical and mental health—and it impacts life expectancy. (For more, listen to this episode of Hidden Brain, or check out his book, Together).
2. We’re isolated – Getting together in person with the people we most care about has become less frequent. This 2023 study from Civic Science provides the numbers: less than half (43%) of adult American socialize with friends in person on a daily/weekly basis.
3. We’re burned out – The World Health Organization recognized workplace burnout in 2019, long before people stared speaking of “quiet quitting.” And while it’s not all four-alarm-fire-burning, Adam Grant’s NYT article mid-pandemic (April 2021) gave us the vocabulary to describe and assess feelings of joylessness and aimlessness when he spoke of “languishing,” the “neglected middle child of mental health that can dull your motivation and focus.”
4. And not just at work – For parents with young kids, “parental burnout” is prevalent, and workplace policies play a part. From this 2022 NYT article: “It’s a state where you have been giving, and giving, and giving and giving—until you’re totally empty.”
5. We’re not as engaged at work as before – Gallup’s engagement survey shows that workplace engagement has dropped to 32% in the US. Why? Lack of connection, with many jobs that feel more like "gigs" than careers. (For the numbers and analysis, read this NPR story.)

I know, I know. I picked a set of depressing trends. And before you say it—no, we can’t blame it all on working remotely. About 15% of U.S. workers are fully remote, and 30% are hybrid. This episode of Freakonomics Radio speaks to the benefits of remote work. (Pretty convincing!)
​
What trends would you add to round out this view? And what trend will you, as a leader with loads of leverage and pockets full of great ideas, work to turn around?

This article was posted Sonia Checchia's LinkedIn articles on July 17, 2023.

Image credit: Bru-nO from Pixabay

​You have a menu of leadership development programs, a rigorous set of competencies for each level, and clear roles and responsibilities. Yet your leadership is not where it needs to be. People are letting you down – they are hesitant to speak up, they struggle to sell new ideas with an appropriate business case, and too often, they wait to be directed or told what to do.

What’s missing?

It’s all in the culture.

(Warning, there’s business jargon in the text that follows. It may be disturbing to some audiences.)

From an organizational culture standpoint, there are three things that organizations that are excellent at leadership development do well, and consistently. Yes, all three are needed. Some may call it “three legs of a stool.”

(See, I warned you about the business speak.)

Three things the best orgs do to grow a solid leadership pipeline:

1.) They expect leadership at all levels. Whether you’re the pilot flying the plane or the person grabbing the bags from the cargo hold, demonstrating leadership is about professionalism, presence, being prepared and taking initiative, being proactive and forward-looking, and accountability. Organizations that grow leaders set the expectation that, regardless of your positional authority, you show up as a leader. Different than ‘fake it as you make it,’ an organization with leaders at all levels anoints employees at all levels with agency.

2.) They have a feedback culture. There’s no getting away with a seemingly innocent side comment or slacking on a task that is out of the spotlight. Cultures that do leadership well democratize feedback-giving—it’s everyone’s job to provide feedback to colleagues, up and down. See something; say something. That comment that made you cringe? Yes, you heard it. You address it. Feedback does not wait until the annual performance reviews, and it’s not limited to the boss-employee relationship. The added bonus is that everyone gets practice giving and receiving feedback (positive and constructive), and in time, everyone is invested in everyone’s growth.

3.) Their leaders are coaches. Leaders who know how to direct action are great in certain circumstances, but not in all. When you want to foster innovation and when you need the best creative problem-solving, you need people who can think through a challenge, consider options, and advocate for a way forward. Organizations that have a strong leadership pipeline teach their leaders basic coaching skills and expect their leaders to use them in most 1:1s and in facilitating meetings.

​
Let me put on my coaching hat for a moment and ask, what will you do today to improve in these areas?



​This article was posted Sonia Checchia's LinkedIn articles on July 10, 2023.

With Mother's Day coming up, I thought I would share a tongue-in-cheek competency model for all the moms out there. I created this as a conversation starter for a baby shower, for a corporate mom-to-be. (Send me a direct message for a formatted copy.) Sharing it, because I thought others might get a kick out of it. And perhaps a pay raise, because, heck, I know we're looking at 'Exceeds' across the board! 

COMPETENCIES

• Listening: Can distinguish ‘hungry’ cry from ‘hurt’ cry. Translates seemingly unintelligible mumble from a toddler into standard speech. (For Exceeds rating: **Can hear a teenager sneaking out of the house.)
• Medical/Nursing: Cares for sick child(ren). Able to dispense medicine when box labels are at a 6-point font, ability to trick a child with a hermetically-sealed mouth to take medicine. At doctor’s or with phone nurse, knows what questions to ask.
• Engineering: Performs toy assembly, battery extraction/replacement; ability to distinguish battery sizes.
• Provisioning: Maintains supplies. Of everything. In current size and two sizes up. (For Exceeds rating: **Near 100% availability of mission-critical supplies such as food, clothing, crayons.)
• Research: Identifies and consults authoritative source for critical information such as parenting strategies, potty-training, car seat safety/size/fit.
• Relationships: Maintains a strong network of informed parents and experts to rely on for support and information. Filters out the goofballs.
• Kin Keeping: Remembers birthdays and special occasions of extended family members. Consistent thank-you card writing, calling, and general checking-up. (For Exceeds rating: **Dresses child in sweater from grandma on day you are seeing grandma.)
• Creativity: Skilled in storytelling, dancing, game-inventing, character-creation, etc., 24/7.
• Celebration: Creates memories through celebration. Commemorates milestones; shares moments with loved ones.
• Nutrition: Provides breakfast, lunch, dinner and snack; some element of green, some semblance of ‘balanced’ diet; not discouraged by the picky eater. (For Exceeds rating: **Emergency banana in purse is always fresh.)
• Flexibility: Ability to adapt as the kid changes the rules on you; speed in reporting for duty at all hours, as needs arise.
• Career: Staying the course at work; creating a positive view of working. Models adulting.
• Cuddles: Hugs at the ready. (For Exceeds rating: **100% hug-ready posture.)
• Documentation: Maintains feeding/poo/pee schedule for baby. For older children, retains masterpiece artwork, photo books. (For Exceeds rating: **Scrapbooking.)

BEHAVIORS​

• Empathy: Connects. Controls emotions when sleep-deprived, awareness of triggers.
• Self-Control: Can bite one’s tongue when urged to curse; can eat virtuously in front of children while craving chocolate.
• Self-Care: Putting oneself first at least once in a while; modeling this for the kids.

TOLERANCES

• Mess: Glitter, piles of Legos, strewn about fill-in-the-blank.
• Noise: Especially screeching, crying, shouting, toys.
• Repetition: Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?

This article was posted Sonia Checchia's LinkedIn articles on May 5, 2022.

Think about the best leaders you’ve had the pleasure of working with. When you imagine their voices in your head, what comes to mind? For me, it’s the stories. I remember a People Services director who, in speaking about his transition to that role, with humility and self-deprecation, joked that his only credentials were his initials: ‘H.R.’ And the college dean who, wearing a suit, tie, and a baseball cap, spoke about the importance of ‘being a fan,’ and how this related to his work connecting across cultures.

Stories entertain, delight, teach, inspire, and help us make sense of our experiences. In the workplace, leaders rely on stories to share about their life experiences and to connect with others, or to rally a group around a mission. Are your pockets filled with the right set of stories? Here are five stories every leader needs to have at the ready--

1. The Backstory – On occasion, you’ll be asked about your career path or have the chance to speak about how you chose your current profession. This is the story you need to polish before any job interview, or before meeting new leadership. You may wish to highlight what drew you to your work, or what it means to you.

For years I led a monthly webinar series on various career topics, and at one event our speaker was a DC-based executive who had led a successful career consulting in the intelligence space. Having studied journalism in college, she told us that she “stumbled upon” the field of intelligence analysis. Early days in her career, she “did time” in a damp basement of a government building where she and her colleagues staged water bug races. The story was funny and memorable. It reflected her flexibility, provided insights into how to adapt the skills you learn in school to a client's need, and made a highly accomplished exec (read: intimidating!) very approachable.

2. The Aha – This is your personal genesis story. For leaders in large organizations, it may be the moment that a blind spot lifted, or that suddenly you had a great idea that transformed your organization. For entrepreneurs, this may be the breakthrough moment when you determined your main business offering.

NPR’s How I Built This with Guy Roz podcast features one of these stories in nearly every episode. In one episode, Roz interviews Stacy Madison, the founder of Stacy’s Pita Chips. Madison started her business selling sandwiches out of a cart. Every day, she’d toast the leftover pita bread, break it into chips, and serve it as a snack for customers waiting in line. One day, she had the idea to make the chips the primary business product. What had been the leftovers suddenly became the feature product. Ten years later, Pepsi bought the company for $250 million.

3. The Big Win – This is one you may need to have ready to help encourage yourself (or a group) when things go sour. 'Big win' stories also tend to showcase your values. What’s a proud moment—an achievement or big win that you worked hard for? These stories tend to be centered around events such as graduations or other big life/career milestones.

A government appointee I heard speak recently reminisced about the details of his swearing-in ceremony. He talked about how meaningful that day was to his family (including recent immigrants) and spoke of his strong patriotism and commitment to serve the country. What struck me as he spoke were the details he chose to share—who was sitting where, the angle the photographer captured when photographing the event, and even what he was wearing.

4. The Outsider – This story can serve to encourage others who are ramping up in a role, and also spotlight strength in your character. It could be childhood story from your first sleep-away camp or the chance to take center stage when the lead actor was out sick. It could be about feeling like a fish out of water, or it could be about faking it until you make it.

When I was eleven, I spent the summer in my parents’ hometown in Italy. It was my second time on an airplane. I had very limited (and passive) knowledge of the language, and was a pretty shy kid. A neighbor (of course her name was Maria) took me under her wing. It was a small mountain village, and my arrival was a pleasant break from the routine. She jokes now that my vocabulary was limited to ‘Nutella,’ and the Italian word for watermelon. I clung to her side that whole summer. She kept me safe, and she spoke for me. What I learned from that experience was the power of a friend—just one—to get through any new situation. (Incidentally, the Gallup best friend at work question should have been my idea.)

5. The Oops – This is story about a mistake, and how you recovered from it. It can be a chance to share a lesson learned, show self-awareness, and/or demonstrate resilience.

I recently heard a senior executive in an IT organization talk about a mistake he made early in his career. In setting up a recovery system for the company’s email—this is in the days of tape back-up systems—he never tested the set-up. He discovered the mistake when it was too late. Email was down, boss was on travel, and the recovery took days. He shared the story after being prompted to share a “favorite failure.” The room was full of IT professionals, and lots of heads were nodding…So many lessons learned from this bad situation—and, as he shared, it inspired his career in IT operations.

Feeling like you might not be ready with your stories?

Take a simple next step. Begin by listening for your stories. Over the next few days, take note of which stories you choose to tell, and in what context. You can dig into your past if you don’t have the five stories above covered. Think about pivotal moments and mishaps, fist pumps and tears.

​For resources on how to tell a memorable story—including determining which details to include and how to sequence them—refer to this series of posts on getting started with business storytelling from Shawn Callahan, author of Putting Stories to Work.


Acknowledgements: A special shout-out to Dr. Anna Marie Trester, master stortyteller and storylistener, consultant and coach, for planting the seed that grew into this article. For more on her 'pocket full-o-stories' approach, check out this article.


This article was posted Sonia Checchia's LinkedIn articles on February 10, 2022.

I had a wonderful salad yesterday at the new Sweet Green in Indianapolis. It's January (Salad Season!), so predictably the place that prides itself in fresh, healthy options, was packed, and the "fry" places all around it were empty. While waiting in the long line, I had time to look around, and posted behind the kitchen was a board with the Sweet Green core values. (If you don't know Sweet Green, it's a build-your-own kind of fast-food restaurant that's environmentally focused). Here's how the values read:

Sweet Green Core Values
Win, win win: Create solutions where the customer wins, the community wins, and the company wins.
Think sustainably: Make decisions that last longer than you will.
Keep it real: Cultivate authentic food and relationships.
Add the sweet touch: Create meaningful connections every day.
Make an impact: Leave people better than you found them.
Live the sweetlife: Celebrate your passion and your purpose.

If you ask employees about it, corporate core values are one of those things that either evoke an instant eye-roll reaction, or a puffed chest of pride. Very little in between. (And I'd argue that you can have super engaged employees who are eye-rollers. Your reaction to corporate values has little to do with your commitment to the job.)

Values are one of the many important ways you can try to put some words to the question of, "What is your culture?" 

The set of values and descriptions reflects your organizational culture, and where you put them, and how you use and reference them, also says a lot about the place and the people...which can help you attract the right people, as employees and clients.

As a communications consultant, I have had a peek into many different organizations, and I have to admit that it takes a lot to win me over when it comes to wearing your corporate core values on your sleeve. Yet some organizations do it particularly well. What does that look like?

How do you effectively share your core values?

For some organizations, sharing their values involves posting posters, etc. in prominent areas such as break rooms or by the elevators. For others, it's regularly about referencing the values in leadership talking points, sharing stories that illustrate the core values (e.g., newsletter articles or employee spotlight articles or podcasts), or even building awards programs to recognize values in action. Some organizations take it a step further and ask employees to report on how they are living the values, i.e., in performance appraisals, etc. 

And what's the differentiator?

Many organizations keep the core values in-house and miss that important step of sharing them with the customer or client. That's the accountability piece that's often missing, and it's important PR as well.

​For customer-service based organizations, it is very powerful to post the core values where the customer can see, react to, and respond to them (in line at the salad bar or on the "waiting on hold" script for the help desk). ​The online shoe company Zappos does a great job sharing their values. Have you noticed the note on their shoe boxes? It says  "Zappos core value: Create fun and a little weirdness."

​Where does it start?

It all starts with designing a set of values that makes sense, passes the Goldilocks rule (i.e., not too big or too small), and matches the tone of the organization. For example, Zappos is with the city of Austin and keepin in weird. Sweet Green is more tender and personal with references to things like the "sweet touch."

If you are looking to develop a set of core values or want to take a fresh look at your current values, consider some tips I have picked up over the years.

​V: Vivid descriptions that you can easily remember and rattle off
A: Avoid the super-comprehensive thought-of-everything mega-list
L: Levity is so important, and keep it positive
U: Understandable (plain English!) and relatable to most days on the job
E: Emotional and feeling-based
S: Simple is best


What have you seen in action? What examples do you have of organizations that do a great job "living" their values?

It’s summer, and hopefully you have planned to take some well deserved time off. (And I mean more than a long weekend, please!)
 
If so…here is a challenge…
 
I recently saw two out-of-office messages (i.e., email auto-replies) that made me smile. Paraphrasing a bit:
 
“I am on paternity leave (baby girl __ was born on ___). Out of the office until ___. Acting for me is ___.”
 
“I am in Disney World with my grandchildren. Contact ___ for assistance until I return on ___.”
 
I love how these leaders used their out-of-office messages as a vehicle to share a glimpse into their personal lives with their coworkers and clients. They could have just said, “contact so and so while I am out…” But instead they took the opportunity to keep it real. In sharing something personal, they are helping us see them as "whole" leaders, with lots of dimensions at work and beyond. Kudos to them for modeling authenticity and for keeping us honest with the notion that time off really means time away from the office, out of email, and unplugged.
 
Is this a new trend? If not, let's make it one. Do you accept the challenge?

​This week has been full of firsts. Not big milestone firsts. Just new-to-me firsts. From house repairs, to second-grade homework help, to stretch assignments at work, there have been a few moments where I have found myself feeling my way in the dark. 
 
While I know communication is not the solution to every problem, I also know that there’s a communication element to every solution. In this case, it’s questions. Also, lists. Love a good list. So...I made a list of three questions to ask when I feel the “new thing” anxiety rising. Sharing, in case it's helpful.

​ 

1. “This is new for me. Can you help me through this?” Let the other person in on the source of your anxiety. Let them know you may need more context or may need to slow down. For example, if you’re talking with a plumber about a repair, it could be routine for them, but completely new to you. (Nothing against plumbers, but I think they forget sometimes.)
2. “If this were your ___, what would you do?” Whether it’s a leaky roof or a chipped tooth, it’s helpful to flat out ask for advice. It can help you narrow your options, and you never know what ideas may come from the discussion.
3. “What else should I be asking?” This question will buy you time and help you reflect for a minute, before you wrap up. It also helps the other person offer advice or guidance that they may be holding back. 

 
What would you add to the list?

Here is an issue that comes up a lot with execs I support: They send an email out to the team, or share some thoughtful remarks in a big meeting, and they don’t hear back. From anyone. Crickets!

While they think they have set the tone for an “interactive” discussion and invite “two-way” conversation, it feels more like a broadcast out…the late-night type, that reaches someone snoozing on the sofa. 
 
The higher you climb, the less likely you are to receive candid reactions and feedback. Or, at least, the smaller the pool of people who feel ratified (or emboldened enough) to do so.
 
As a leader, what can you do?
 
You really have to work for it. Here are three strategies to encourage candor and open discussion at work. 

1. Go back for more. I once asked my mother-in-law, who is very good at picking melons, how she knows which melon is good. Her reply? “If you get a good one, go back to that same place and buy another.” (Yes, I am still in need of a lesson on picking a good melon, but that’s for another day.) However, her advice is perfect for this topic! Reach out to those trusted colleagues who consistently give it to you STRAIGHT. Let them know how much you appreciate and value their insights. “There are not a lot of people on the team who share comments with candor, and I need more of this. The good, the bad, and the ugly. Thank you!”
2. Ask for help. If you’re heading into a big team meeting, make an effort before the discussion to line up some comments. Reach out to a few people, at different levels/locations/tenure in the organization, and let them know that you need their help. Ask them to comment or ask questions in the meeting. This is not about telling them what to say, but rather it’s about letting them know that their voice will help others speak up. “I really want to hear your comments and know you will help others speak up by speaking up first.”
3. Make it safe. Creating some distance between the people and the subject can make it easier for people to speak up. For example, share some data and then ask for reactions. Case studies, or articles on a topic also work. If you have access to an employee engagement survey, for example, share the charts and then ask the group to speak to what they see—expected to see—or are surprised by. This strategy works because it allows people who may not want to share a personal experience speak with some safe distance. Over time, it allows people to open up. “When you look at this, what do you see?”

 
How openly and candidly a group speaks is a reflection of the organizational culture. As a leader, you help set the tone by getting the discussion going, and then by how you react to what’s shared. Over time, you will create a culture of feedback and exchange. You’ll not only ensure you are not missing something, but you’ll forge stronger connections across the organization.

One of the nicest compliments I have received lately is, “Sonia, I love your emails.” 
 
(Dorky? Not for me!)
 
In a world where every single office-working human has multiple email inbox(es), MS Teams channels, a phone full of text messages, and notifications/messaging for every social media platform, I was tickled pink. What a nice thing for someone to notice. I am in the business of communications, so email is my currency.

​It’s important to make it easy for others to understand, remember, and reply to an email message. Bonus if you can avoid annoying people in the process! 
 
Starting with the email subject line, here are some tips.

1. Include the deadline. If your email is asking for something by a certain date, please don’t expect me to open the email (and read the WHOLE THING) to find out the deadline. Put the deadline in the subject line. This tip goes first because it’s my biggest pet peeve. Second biggest pet peeve is when a date is mentioned, but there’s no day of the week called out. (Please say “Friday, 12/3” not just “12/3.”) Don’t send me to the calendar to look to see what day 12/3 is. Make it easy for me to do what you need me to do. (Deep breaths...) Emotions aside, adding the deadline to your email subject line is the single most effective way to get someone to HEED your deadline. Okay, so I have no data to support this assertion. Just trust me. Examples:

• Agenda review > Due Friday, 12/3
• Due COB Friday, 12/3 | Feedback on Strat Plan 

2. Flag the call to action. Ideally, before you open the email, you know if you (personally) have to take action on it. In your subject line, include words such as “for review,” etc., to make the action clear. Here are some good ones:

• For review: Slides for CHO meeting on Thurs., 12/9
• Input requested: Proposal feedback
• Decision needed: Go/no go on purchase
• Your vote needed: Pick a tagline

 
3. Tell me if there is NO action needed. You can do this in the email subject line, and there’s a companion feature, too! Use the light blue down arrow in Outlook. It shows up in the same spot as the nasty red exclamation point that indicates urgency, only it has a cooling, calming effect in your inbox. Try it. A couple good phrases are: “FYI” and “No reply needed.”

4. Include a symbol or emoji. To make longer email subject lines easier to read, I use a lot of “>” (you find it on the keyboard below the letter “L”) and “|” (it’s the key above “return”) symbols. Just for fun (and to make your message stand out in a packed inbox) add a non-alpha character or emoji to your subject line. Home Depot is doing it. You can, too. (In Outlook, “Insert” > “Symbol.”)  See more detailed instructions here.

5. Make it personal. This works especially if you are emailing someone who you do not know well, or who may not recognize your name in their inbox. I am not encouraging spam, just helping those who may not know you recognize that the email REALLY is for them, and they REALLY do need to open it/reply. Something like this:

• Quick question for Fred: Quote for article on supply chain
• Input request for Fred: Feedback on employee newsletter

 
What other tips would you add?

Confession. I am sucker for gift guides. And my inbox and social media feeds are full of them this week. It got me thinking about what an at-work holiday gift guide would look like. Here’s a start. It’s unsponsored (ha!) unedited (that’s the beauty of having your own blog!) and very much like the unscented, clean-burning soy candles on many influencers’ gift lists, it’s one-size-fits most. I hope you’ll read it with a sense of humor, as it’s intended—and forward it to your BFF at work, or maybe use it to spark conversations at your next team meeting. 

1. Candid Feedback—Feedback is a gift. What have you not made time to share? 
2. Kudos for a Job Well Done—At any given point, there are so many people you could reach out to thank. Pick one.
3. A Stretch Assignment—There’s someone on your team who needs this, along with your vote of confidence that they are ready.
4. Exposure—Bring someone along to a meeting or ask someone to present in front of a key stakeholder. 
5. Sounding Board—Help someone by listening, asking questions, and letting them sort out the issue. Avoid giving advice.
6. Coverage—Offer to cover for someone so they can TRULY step out when they need to.
7. Connect—Who have you not talked to in months? Give them a call.
8. No-Meeting Day—It is possible! Just try!
9. No-Email Day—Also possible! Just try!
10. Time Off—I mean really. Close the office.

 
Taking a step back, I see that there is some holiday spirit in this “silly” list after all. The themes that stand out to me are time, recognition, and connection. No gift receipt needed! Hope you receive at least one, and hope you give many.

​“I’d like to thank my team. This is truly the best team, and you have really hit it out of the park. You should be very proud of your contributions.” ​(Um...You're welcome?)
 
Let’s talk for a minute about thank-you’s. Not the “thank you for passing the salt” but the big, ceremonial ones. The “you are the best team” and “I am so proud to call you my colleagues” types of thank-you’s that you hear in the workplace. As a communications consultant, I am often the one helping execs get their talking points together before big meetings. In my experience, these types of blanket “great job team” comments go in one ear…and out the other. There is no lasting feeling of goodness. They don’t fill the heart with gladness. What’s worse: at times, they are so perfunctory that they don’t feel sincere.
 
Yet expressing appreciation is so important! And I believe the intentions are often quite sincere. It just doesn’t come across that way.

There’s got to be a better way. In fact, I can offer a few. 
 
What are some effective ways to express gratitude?

1. Share a story or real example. Often, leaders are hesitant to call out one person, or one group, for fear of leaving someone out, or for fear of giving the perception of having favorites. Yet a real example is exactly the type of thing we remember. Take us back to the moment when you were stuck, and someone helped you. “Sam called me at 4 pm last Friday to tell me about the issue and at that point the team was already working the resolution.” Also, the impact of spotlighting one person has a positive ripple effect. We all want to celebrate our superstar colleagues. We all want to hear the story of how someone pulled a rabbit from a hat or caught a mistake before it was too late or came up with an idea that turned a project around. 
2. Put it on the team. This is something I learned in a parenting class that works well in a work setting, in particular with team or project meetings. Ask each person in the room to pick someone to acknowledge. “I would like to acknowledge Sam for fixing my Excel spreadsheets, and for always remembering to bring an umbrella.” What you choose to recognize the person for, and who you recognize, is entirely your choice. In response, the person can nod or say thank-you, but there’s no reply needed. You will be delighted at the variety of comments, and people will be touched at having been appreciated for big and small things. It takes less than 1 minute per person, yet it leaves a lasting glow.
3. Turn to the customer. If you have a feedback mechanism, such as customer surveys, share comments of appreciation in the words of your customer. Read a quote verbatim and ask the employee to elaborate on the story. They may not even remember having helped the person, which can be a fun twist. ("I just do that kind of great work all the time!")
   
4. Ask for shout-outs. In a team meeting and with medium-sized groups: Ask for input in advance of the meeting. Create a slide for each comment and weave them into the meeting materials (perhaps at transitions). On Zoom and with large groups: Invite the audience to type a shout-out in the chat. Moderators can read out select comments as they come in, radio-show style. You’ll have a confetti effect – a flurry of good wishes that are a real pick-me-up.

 
What else works for you?

A few doors down from my office, there was a red sticker that said “SAFE ROOM.” I understood it to be a Pride sticker, or a sign in solidarity with the LBTGQ community. Pride flags and stickers were common where I had worked prior. Until one day, when there was a fire in the adjacent parking garage, and I heard everyone saying, “Go to the safe room.’” Ah, ha! I had gotten my symbols crossed. It was a particular surprise because I thought cross-cultural savvy was my superpower. But there’s always more learning to do.
 
Misunderstandings of all sorts are inevitable as you start a new job. When you're ramping up in a new role, you get confused, and you confuse others. Over the years as a consultant, I have worked with many different clients, and I have become accustomed to meeting new people and groups regularly. There are a lot of common missteps that happen when you are new to a group or organization. Here’s what I have noticed…a few areas where people stumble.

1. Sense of time – When I first started supporting federal government clients, I was always late to meetings. It was because I was dialing in on time—i.e., connecting at 1:00 p.m. ET for a meeting scheduled at that time. Meanwhile, the others started connecting a couple of minutes early, so the meeting could start as the clock rolled over to 1:00 p.m. Needless to say, I adjusted quickly.
2. Terms of address – Americans have become more casual in recent decades, and most exchanges are on a first-name basis. But not all. When I worked at Booz Allen Hamilton a decade ago, everyone was called by their first name with one notable exception: Dr. Ralph Shrader, CEO. He was not the only PhD in the 25,000-person organization, but he was the only “Dr.” Over the years, I have noticed some former military colleagues stumble in this area. When entering a workplace where everyone is on a first-name basis, they struggle to edit out the “Mr.” or “Ms.,” which has the effect of creating distance and a power dynamic. You’re seating yourself at the kids’ table if you call your boss “Ms.” And no one else does. As uncomfortable as it may be, at work you want to do as others do. 
3. Email style – This may seem odd in the business world, but some organizations (hello, academia!) still treat email as letters. A message might start with “Dear…” and what follows is in traditional paragraph form. Other organizations treat emails more like text messages. Short and choppy. And that’s okay. It’s not disrespectful. It’s their way. Most of the places I work in do something in between—emails are on the shorter side, bulleted lists are abundant, and there’s a greeting at the top and a signature at the end. Usually the opening greeting is a “Hello, Sam,” and not a “Dear Sam.” And the closing is simply a “Thank you!” and not a more formal closing such as “Sincerely” or “Best wishes.”

 

What do you do when you are unsure of the custom in your new organization?

When in doubt, ask. “I am used to doing this____. What do you all do?” You'll find that everyone is an anthropologist at heart. We love talking about organizational quirks, business jargon, and workplace culture. And we never make time to do it.

Another great question, as you do your round of meet-and-greets, is to ask, "When you first started, where did you stumble?" People love to share stories of mishaps from their early days (and be sure to find out also how they recovered from the set backs). Asking and sharing these stories opens up a dialogue so others will feel more open to give you feedback later on, as well.
 
​
It’s no surprise that most of the stumbling blocks I noted above relate to communication. We get work done through talk, and as a linguist and communications consultant, that’s what I am tuned in to notice. But...What have I left off the list?

As I child in gym class, I remember being instructed to take deep breaths as we did warm-up and stretching exercises. "Because breathing is so important." I also remember dreading the breathing exercises as much as sit-ups and the eight-minute mile. Fast forward a few decades, I became certified as a yoga instructor and happily did an entire unit on breathing. All while sitting on a hard wood floor. For hours. The difference was a few decades, yes. But it was also that I understood WHY breathing is so important. Someone took the time to explain to me how breathing is connected with the heart rate and nervous system. 
 
(If you are curious about why breathing is important…this Mindful.org article by Caren Osten Gerszberg explains it BEAUTIFULLY and was the inspiration for this blog post.)

On the one hand, it’s super important for leaders to clearly state what is important, and get everyone aligned on priorities. No one can argue with that. On the other, simply saying “it’s important," without any deeper discussion, is kind of like saying “because I said so.” It’s a power-play. Let’s face it. Who declares what’s important? The boss. Mom/dad. The teacher. Whoever is in charge. 

Incidentally, in the business world, "it's important" shows up in a few ways. It's also

• Strategic priorities
• Business drivers
• Goals
• Focus areas

I am not suggesting you edit out the word "important." I am suggesting that you don't stop there. Unpack it a bit. Here's what sharing more looks like:

1. A story > This is the time to pull out a compelling customer story or real business examples that illustrate the benefits, the positive impact, the real good that comes from it.
2. The data > A picture is worth 1000 words. That goes for charts and graphs, too.
3. A reminder of the vision > "We want to get to a place where we are able to ____, or where our customers are able to ____. This is a step in that direction."
4. Back & forth > Get the group talking about why it’s important to them. Hear what ideas surface. Listen like a trampoline. Bounce the ideas back. Now you’ve got momentum.

I have been ghost-writing for execs for years. The biggest compliment is not so much when a client says, “you make me sound good”—although I do love to hear it—it’s when someone repeats something I’ve written. That’s when I know it’s stuck. 
 
The majority of the work I do is behind-the-scenes. I am the one writing talking points for a panel discussion, drafting the executive topper that you see at the start of a newsletter or annual report, and drafting emails and PowerPoint slides that others will send or present. It’s more than just packaging and “prettying up” slides—my role is figuring out what to say and how to say it so the key messages are received.

​You have to put the tentacles out there and do a lot of sensing—to figure out where there are info gaps and get a pulse on the buzz in the organization. It also requires a high level of trust with the execs you support. In this role, what have I learned, and what does every busy executive need to know about how they communicate with their team?

​If you scan the business books published in the past two decades, you’ll find every flavor of leader: servant leader, leader-as-coach, authentic leadership, compassionate leadership, etc. There’s also a great deal written about leaders as storytellers. What about funny leaders?

​Funny at work? Before I lose my data-driven readers, let me share some numbers to remind you of what work looks like:

• The average office worker spends 5 hours a day on email (ref: Adobe email study)
• The average executive spends 23 hours a week in meetings (ref: HBR article by Leslie Perlow, Constance Noonan Hadley, and Eunice Eun)

 
That’s the baseline, people! This is how we’re spending our time. Can we spice it up a bit?
 
Like me, you may be thinking you’re not a particularly funny person. You could not try to crack people up if you tried. But it’s not about stand-up comedy. In the book Humor, Seriously, authors Naomi Bagdonas and Jennifer Aaker remind us that it’s not about having a performative sense of humor. It’s about levity. 
 
Bagdonas and Aaker build the case that links humor to career success. They share that employees who use (work-appropriate) humor are 23% more respected. Leaders with a sense of humor are seen as 27% more motivating, and their employees report feeling 15% more engaged.
 
Let’s face it. Most of the time, work is not fun. When it is fun, we are more creative problem-solvers, and we get more done. And humor is one way to make work fun. 
 
So why do we hold back? Why do we check the funny bone at the door?
 
There are lots of reasons that make us hesitant to use humor at work. I surveyed a few colleagues, and here’s what we came up with:
 

• Fear of being perceived as unprofessional 
• Fear of insulting someone
• Fear of not being taken seriously

 
Those are the primary reasons we avoid humor. There are just as many reasons to intentionally add humor to the workday. The question is how to get there? 

(It’s a ‘yes/and’ kind of situation.) I polled some trusted colleagues for real examples. Here are a few:

• Someone will be absent from a meeting? No problem, you jokingly assign all actions to them
• Open your next meeting by sharing work travel mishaps, e.g., mixing up the hand lotion and shampoo at the hotel; losing your luggage and attending a board meeting in a Hawaiian shirt
• Tell a dad joke; ask others to tell their favorite dad jokes 
• Change your name to “Connecting to Audio…” in Zoom
• You miss something in a discussion? “Mea culpa. I was asleep on the job.”​
• Sing “Workin’ for a living” acapella, in the bathroom
• Add an element of surprise, as you see with this Microsoft note ("Nothing in Deleted Items. Someone finally took out the trash.")

Years ago, my astute officemate noticed something. We were listening to see if the conference room down the hall was going to become available.
 
“The meeting is wrapping up,” she said.
 
“How can you tell?” I asked.
 
“They are laughing. People always laugh at the end of a meeting.” She was right. 
 
Have you ever noticed that there’s often laughter at the end of a meeting? It’s not that someone always cracks a joke at the end of the meeting. It’s that laughter is one of those things we humans do. For politeness, for camaraderie, to connect. Social contagion. Try it.

 As you look at the week ahead, what is that 'something big' that you have the chance to influence? It may be that you...

• Need to socialize the refreshed strategy or FY priorities
• Need to tell others about your serving offerings 
• Are preparing a summary of key findings from your research, or 
• Are updating a roadmap of milestones for your project.

 
Yes? Then, what you need is a one-pager. 
 
Yes, I know. You have a lot to say. There are so many super important details. There’s a lot of context you need to provide, and of course you don’t want anyone to not have the FULL story. Right.
 
Really, what you need is a one-pager.
 
It’s the single most powerful thing you can create to increase your influence and get people on board with an idea. Consultants have known this for years. Busy execs, too. The one-pager is the PowerPoint MVP! It’s the one thing an exec will choose to print out. It’s the thing they’ll grab as they head to a meeting. 
 
The brain science behind it is called Dual Coding (Allan Pavio). With a one-pager, you’re giving equal weight to the words and the visuals. 
 
So how do you create one? How do you get ALL THAT INFO onto ONE page?
 
(And of course we’re saying a “page,” but we’re actually talking about a slide in PowerPoint. But you already knew that.)

Step 1: Figure out what you want to say

• Set a timer for two minutes. Get out a piece of paper and your favorite pen. What is your idea in 20 words or less? Jot it down.
• What images come to mind? Jot down your ideas, or better yet – sketch them.
• Step back and see what you have. Are there groupings or buckets? Is there a sequence or path? Is there a list? 

 
Step 2: Package it

• Open up PowerPoint, and start building your slide. You’ve seen a zillion slides with columns, boxes, cycles, and pyramids. Don’t overthink it. Pick a design that matches the meaning and keep it as simple as possible.
• If you don’t have access to a professional designer, use the smart art, sign up for services such as SlideTeam.com, SlideModel.com, SlidesGo.com, or others.

 
PRO TIP: I keep a “Frankenstein” folder on my desktop where I dismember and re-use good slides. Recycling is efficient!
 
Step 3: Test it

• Give your draft slide to a trusted friend. A good one-pager is like a kids’ picture book. It tells a story. Ask someone who is seeing the slide for the first time to voicetrack it for you. (“If you were presenting this slide, what would you say?”) Ideally, there’s enough info on the slide to build the narrative. 
• Listen to what they say, and in what order. That will tell you how the eye “reads” the slide. Adjust your one-pager accordingly.

 
PRO TIP: Remember, word economy. Every word counts. Avoid long narratives and phrases that may cause confusion or have multiple meanings.


You ready? Now get going! 
​

Gathering lessons learned is one of those things smart organizations make time to do. For one, never let a crisis go to waste. Also, things move so rapidly that it sometimes takes a deliberate exercise such as a lessons learned activity to force reflection on what worked, so we know to repeat it for next time. And share the goodness beyond the group that was engaged in the work. We can all learn from it.

​So here it goes. Lessons learned on lessons learned.

For each person you interview, you’ll want to understand their role in the effort. The questions below are a great starter kit. You may want to share the questions in advance to allow for the ideas to percolate.
 

1. As you reflect on ___, what’s one thing that went particularly well?
2. What contribution(s) are you personally most proud of? Where do you feel you made the greatest impact?
3. How did you communicate? (Meetings, emails, chat, shouting across the room…)
4. What resource (could be technology, a person, etc.) did you rely heavily on?
5. What was a pain point? Think back to a moment of particular frustration (if there was one). What was happening?
6. What do you want to remember to never repeat?
7. What surprised you?
8. If you had to repeat this activity/project, what’s on your wishlist?
9. What do you know now, that you wish you knew at the start?
10. What can others learn from your experience?

 
 
Once you have all your notes and sit back, squint your eyes a little, and see what stands out, you’ll be in a position to write up the lessons learned. I find that the more time you spend refining the takeaways and themes, the better. And if you can get it down to an exec summary one-pager, you’re golden! 

“She is an excellent listener.” This is a real piece of feedback, early career days, from one of my first performa​nce reviews. It jolted me back to grade school, when my report card was hand-written in perfect Catholic-school-teacher cursive, and always would include something to the effect of, “She’s a pleasure to have in class.”
 
In both instances, my reaction, masked by a polite smile, was the same: That’s the best you got? 
 
You see, what I wanted to be recognized for was the stuff that came hard. The things I had to work at. The big things. 


Fast-forward a few years, I get it. 

Now, as a communications consultant, most of what I do starts with listening. Many communications consultants have the equivalent of x-ray hearing. We’re paying attention to how things are said—tone, pitch, intonation, turn taking, who’s talking over whom, who speaks last—and (just as important) what’s not said. We’re thinking about what conversations are missing, and how we force that gust of info through an organization. We’re also standing up in the lighthouse, looking out for confusion. Some dogs are trained to sniff for truffles—I can sniff out a misunderstanding. 

(Thank you for indulging that jumble of metaphors and not judging.)
 
So what’s my process? How do you listen better, more deeply? 

1. Board the boat: Setting the context for a meeting up front, and making sure everyone is “on the same boat,” as one of my colleagues often jokes, is essential. “We left off that ___ and we want to discuss ____.” Bonus: levity. The boat reference always brings a chuckle, and science tells us that we do better work when we also share a laugh.
2. Slow down: If you’ve ever transcribed a minute of talk, you know you have to STOP, REWIND, REPLAY…several times. We can’t possibly catch everything that’s said the first time around. In a discussion, that means rephrasing, asking for clarity, and—yes—slowing things down if needed. “Let me make sure I got this right…” You’ll feel unpopular. Our culture rewards speed and getting things quickly. Yet I have found that spending a minute or two up front to ensure understanding is worth hours of rework at the back end.
3. Listen with your eyes: I was in a meeting last week with a group of leaders who were looking for ways to be more present with their staff. One of them had been “scolded” by a team member, who asked her to “listen with her eyes.” It speaks to the times. Even in meetings, we’re tempted to “quickly respond” to a text or IM. “It’ll just take a second,” we think. Maybe so. But ask for a minute’s pause if you need to tend to something that pops up. Avoid sidebars. Put up your “do not disturb” and hold a pencil if you can’t keep your hands off the keyboard. 
4. Double check: At the end of meetings, I am often the one who stops to check everyone’s understanding of action items and follow ups. “Let me recap what I heard…” It feels annoying sometimes, I’ll admit. It’s a lot of who’s on the hook for what, by when. But it results in a lot of, “glad I checked” moments. 

 
I recently heard design guru Bruce Mau speak about his book, Mau: MC 24, Bruce Mau's 24 Principles for Designing Massive Change in Your Life and Work. One of the things he said is, 

(Here’s the link to that talk, if you have 30 min.)
 
Yes! Listening plays a big part in that.

Image credit: Mary Engelbreit

​Years ago, I worked at Booz Allen Hamilton, a large consulting firm in the DC area. For two years, my office was on the recruiting floor. All around me were interview rooms, networking events, and lots of hardworking recruiters. They were all go-getters. Big personalities! They walked fast, dressed to the nines, and got a lot of work done. It's the closest I will ever get to working on the floor of the stock exchange or in a newsroom. So much energy! I have kept in touch with a few of the recruiters I met during that time. It’s no surprise. Recruiters are amazing at building and maintaining relationships. It’s their job. Without a network, there are no candidates. I was thinking about how good recruiters are at networking, and thought we could all take a lesson from them. Here's what I observed...

 

1. Answer your messages. This may seem obvious, but you’d be surprised. I recently set a question via LinkedIn (messenger) to a group of recruiters who were former coworkers from years past. I received responses within hours. They stay on top of all their inboxes!
2. Don’t be shy. If you’re interested in talking with someone, reach out. Recruiters don’t hesitate if it’s someone they do not know, someone who may be “too important,” or someone they have not connected with in years. Just reach out. What’s the worst that can happen? 
3. Use all the channels. Given our reliance on social media, the lines between personal and professional relationships are blurred. Many former colleagues are also Facebook or Instagram friends. You can learn a lot from those who use all the channels. The occasional personal post on Facebook can help you connect with people from years back in your career, and it can help you get to know current colleagues at a deeper level. 
4. Leverage every opportunity. A recruiter who checked my references for a job years ago made friends with the woman I provided for my reference check! No surprise, she also makes friends in line at the grocery store. Leverage every opportunity.
5. Do something everyday. Whether you’re the type to regularly schedule lunch or coffee dates, or simply spend five minutes a day reading your LinkedIn feed and commenting on posts, you’re doing something. Another recruiter I worked with would leave her lunch in a different kitchen every day. (There were two kitchens on each floor, and the building was big.) That would allow her to meet new people every day while warming up her lunch. Also provided exercise. You pick the thing. Consistency is the key.

 
 What did I miss? What would you add to the list?

Over the past few years, I have been neglecting my professional network. I also really miss my chats with some of my favorite work friends from years past. Between leaving the DC area, the demands of motherhood (goodbye, free time!), and leaving a large employer, I had not kept up with my work buddies. Many of them had new jobs and had made big life changes—and I had not so much as checked in! (Do Facebook comments count? Not so much.) I also did not have a great avenue for meeting new people and was craving an inspo injection—wanting to hear the latest and greatest from people I admire. 
 
I remembered the movie Field of Dreams. “If you build it, they will come.” 
 
And I built it. I set up a community of practice for my biggest area of focus, internal and employee communications. We meet every other month via Zoom, for an hour. At each meeting we hear from a speaker and then do some mixing and mingling. The format is simple, managing the group is simple, and I have reconnected with dozens of people I adore. It's a start at rebuilding my network, and it's been enriching.

I recycled the idea of a small community of practice, similar to one that I had been part of years back, and it’s a concept that anyone could replicate. In case you’re inspired, here’s what I learned, and a recipe to start your own group…

1. Set your scope – In the world of “comms professionals,” this group is focused on internal and employee comms. Just one slice of the pie. We also have some graphic designers and event planners in the mix.
2. Define the purpose – My initial goals for creating this group were to have a forum for benchmarking, ideas sharing, and easy networking. We revisit the goals informally at each meeting, to make sure the time is well spent. 
3. Start small – I wanted to keep the group small as we were in start-up mode. Our initial group was about two dozen people. We have about half of that number in attendance at each meeting. To create the list, I about spent 10 minutes clicking through my LinkedIn contacts, drafted a list of people who might be interested, and invited that group to join as inaugural members. Since then our inaugural members have shared the invite with friends. The group is already growing. With intention. 
4. Keep it simple – Our meeting format is quite simple. One hour, every other month. Half of the meeting is a presentation on a cool thing (we rotate speakers), and the remainder is for sharing wants and needs. (Also noteworthy: If you set up your own group, you can pick meeting times that work for you!)

 
Have you ever set up or managed a group like this? What tips do you have?

I worked in Learning & Development (aka ‘corporate training’) for nearly a decade. During that time, I did some classroom facilitation and I read A LOT OF participant evaluations. You know, the short questionnaires you complete after a training session that ask what did you like most/least, and what to change for next time. It didn’t take long to see the universal trends in that feedback. It came to mind a few weeks ago as I was reviewing feedback from an offsite, and I thought I'd share it here...

Here are the three things that come up regularly in participant evaluations: 

1. Unclear instructions for activities – If at some point in the training, you’re pairing off or breaking into small groups for discussions (without a facilitator), you know to provide the instructions and repeat them three times. Inevitably someone will say, “Now what are we supposed to be doing?” 

What can you do? Before you send everyone off to the small groups, ask someone from each group if they have questions about what they are supposed to be doing, provide a handout/instructions that is available in the breakouts. If you’re in Zoom, don’t rely on the main presentation materials—send a handout in advance, and make sure everyone has it handy.
 
2. Not enough time in the breakouts – There’s almost always feedback about the time in breakout or small group discussions being TOO SHORT. We humans like to talk, and the discussion time is NEVER enough. “We didn’t all get a chance to talk” or “We rushed through the last person.” Most of the time you leave them wanting more (or complaining that they were rushed).  

What can you do? After you debrief the small-group discussions, ask everyone individually to reflect on one insight or one idea that came out of the discussions. Ask them to jot it down. It’s a simple step that helps them see value in the discussion they had, and think less about what was lacking or how they’d have preferred to have more time.
 
3. Too much content – If you skip over a section of content, if you provide a lot of back-up materials, or if you mention, “Let’s move through this part quickly,” it gives the perception that you’re managing your time poorly or you are cheating the group of some good content. Participants feel they are not getting the full experience. 

What can you do? Create one main presentation with the content that’s essential, and that you’ll definitely make time for. Have additional slides at-the-ready in case you want to supplement the discussion with additional materials. Pull them out if there actually is time, and/or send the additional slides in a follow-up communication after the course. Avoid the chunky back-up section or appendix.
 
 
A lot of these “universals” are relevant to meeting planning and offsites as well.

L&D friends: What would you add to the list?